I might get a little bit random here as I’m not exactly sure what my point is yet, but my main goal is really just to share a couple of thoughts, I guess.
I’ve always wanted a brother. I hadn’t always known that, but now looking back on some certain things in my past, I’ve realized that I have more or less tried to turn most males in my life into a brother. Most of the time it didn’t work out because–well, probably because that’s kind of weird, but also because I wasn’t really sure what I was wanting. It started with male friends, and I would dive right in to a forced comfort with them, wanting to be close (not romantically) and all that was accomplished by that was the education that males are generally perverted (to only share the kinder sentiment there). It taught me that if you wanted attention from a male, sex was the way to get it-not even having sex, just being open about it. That in itself escorted in its own set of unwelcome problems that are beside the point.
Assuming that the only way a male and a female could be in any kind of relationship together, meant that there had to be a romantic connection, I started doing what I could to force that next. Again, not working out for various obvious reasons, I pretty much just gave up on that quest.
Not long after, I fell in love and ended up getting married. My husband has four brothers. Long story short[er], it turned out that a brother was exactly what I had wanted. Up until I got married, I was always more comfortable around guys. They made me feel comfortable and safe somehow. Plus they were easily manipulated (keep in mind, I was 17/18 at the time these were my thoughts).
Now I’ve got four brothers. I’ve known them all for different lengths of time, and have had my ups and downs with most of them, but I’ve become comfortable with them (mostly) and have grown to love them all in spite of their flaws. Those that I am closer to, I enjoy hanging out with when we can, and I love being able to joke around with them and test their limits. I’m so thankful for them all (this would be the thought-provoker on this subject). I love them so much, and I’m glad to be able to consider them friends. Being males of course, it’s just less awkward to blog about it and tell the world than to try to explain it to them 😉